10 Reasons Why I Hate James Potter
by xx Bewitching x3
Summary: JPxLE Lily's best friend challenges her to make a list of reasons why she hates James so much. But maybe James isn't so bad after all. Oneshot


**A/N:** I know, an overused plot bunny. I can't help it! The idea intrigued me. Hope you enjoy! -Christine

**Disclaimer:** You know, if I was JKR, I'd be writing the seventh book, not this little oneshot. All I own is the plot.

* * *

**10 Reasons Why I Hate James Potter**

"Lily Evans! I _swear_ if you don't ask him out I'll... I'll... I'll do something we'll both regret!" shouted an infuriated brunette from her seat on a four-poster bed. Her name was Natalie Dennis, and she had been arguing with her best friend for half an hour over the thing girls fight about most in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry: James Potter.

"Threatening me won't make it any better, Nat," stated the fore mentioned best friend. She was Lily Evans, and she sat on a chair in front of a vanity, taming the many knots in her vibrant red hair. "I'm _not_ asking him out and that's final!"

"But Lily! This is James we're talking about! _The_ James Potter! Do you realize how many girls would love to be in your position?" Natalie fumed. The pillow she had clutched to her chest was practically tearing beneath her fingernails. Miss Dennis was normally a very calm, serene girl whose temper was almost nonexistent. But when it came to people's love lives... It was a whole different story.

"Yes and anyone of them can take my place; I don't want it! Potter is... I just...ERG! I hate Potter!" Lily threw her hairbrush down and began to pace the room. Natalie took careful notice of the way Lily was biting her lip and decided to further her case in a more...tactful way. She stood and placed her arm around Lily's shoulders, and sat her down on the bed.

"Why do you hate James?" she asked gently, rubbing her friend's shoulder. Lily shrugged the hand away and only grunted in reply. "What's that? C'mon, Lils, you can tell me."

"How am I suppose to pick one thing! There are a million reasons I hate him!"

"Well, pick out the worst reasons."

"Yeah, Natalie. I'm going to tell you the top reasons I hate Potter. Sure..."

"Why not?" the brunette asked, slightly offended. Lily sighed.

"All right. I'll tell you. But I want to write it out, so I can remind you next time," Lily said the last sentence pointedly as she summoned a quill and parchment.

"Fine. I want you to write your top..." Natalie thought for a second, "Your top ten reasons why you hate Potter."

"What is this, homework?"

"If it makes you feel better," Nat smirked. "I'll be back later. Good luck." And with that, Natalie Dennis flounced out of the room, most likely looking for another unsuspecting teen's life to ruin. Or at least that's what Lily thought.

"Ten reasons..." Lily muttered to herself as she scowled at the door. "Ten reasons..." Suddenly, the girl was hit with inspiration, and began scribbling down her top ten reasons to hate James Potter.

* * *

Half an hour later, Lily rushed into the library looking for Natalie. She was waving a piece of parchment wildly in the air when she walked in, a look of triumph on her face. She scanned the tables and quickly found her friend pouring over what looked like a hundred stacks of books.

"I finished!" Lily called as she stomped over, earning a warning from Madam Pince. Lily winced in apology and then repeated herself in a stage whisper, "I'm finished."

"So I heard," Natalie said with a chuckle. She set aside her work and laced her fingers patiently. Lily waved the paper in her face and then set it on the table. Now, normally when Lily Evans wrote a paper, it was neat and tidy. But this paper had scratches and marks and even a small rip at the corner. This was definitely something she was determined to do. The title said it all.

**10 Reasons Why I Hate James Potter**

"Well, go on," Lily pestered eagerly. She was very pleased with this list.

"Reason ten is," Natalie stated clearly but quietly. "Sirius Black." She frowned and looked at her friend. "What does Sirius have to do with James?"

"Black is his best mate and his accomplice... And an annoying git." The girls laughed as they recalled Black's most recent crime.

* * *

"Evans!" Sirius called down the corridors one Thursday afternoon. "Evans!"

Lily sighed and stopped as he caught up. "What is it now, Black?"

"I have a proposition for you," he answered, panting slightly from his run. Lily started to walk away but he grabbed her arm. "Please just hear me out, Evans.",

"Fine. What do you want?"

"I want you to help me prank James." Lily couldn't help but feel intrigued.

"How would I be helping with that?" she asked with narrowed eyes.

"Well, you see, I was researching the other day and - "

"Researching! _You_ were _researching_!"

"Yes, I do this only when necessary. Anyway, I was researching the other day and came across this one spell - "

"And you want me to help you learn it?"

"Well... yeah." Lily shook her head and sighed.

"As much as I'd love to help, pranking goes against my morals. Good luck though."

* * *

Lily chuckled quietly as she remembered James walking in the Great Hall the next morning with neon pink hair. It was obvious he didn't know, and nobody told him the entire day. To Lily, it was one of the best days in her life. Natalie snapped her out of her reverie.

"I thought it was brilliant. Shall we go on to the next reason?" Lily nodded. "All right. Reason number nine is his fan girls." Natalie found it hard to stifle her laughter.

"What's so funny?"

"Look!" Natalie sputtered and pointed out the window. The view showed part of the lake, at which James and his friends were lounging near. A flock of around fifteen girls were doing a bad job of hiding behind a nearby bush. Every once and awhile James would wave at them and Sirius would flash a grin, sending one of the girls into fits of giggles. Lily scowled.

"Is Lily jealous?" Natalie said sympathetically. Lily shoved her in the arm and waved at her to continue. She giggled and read the next line. "Reason number eight: his Quidditch skills. What do you care? You hate flying."

"Well..."

"Well what?"

"Actually, I hate heights. But I'd love to learn how to fly. I hate the way he makes it look so easy," Lily said softly, looking at her hands in her lap. Natalie nodded and decided not to press the issue... At least not now, anyway.

"So... Reason number seven is his knack for Transfiguration. That's easy to explain. It's the only class he's ever beat you in."

"No, actually that's not why. He likes to rub it in my face." Lily stared out the window towards James, an evil glare set hard on her delicate features.

* * *

"Evans, now you know the wand movement is a clockwise flourish and two upwards flicks. It's really very simple. Here I'll show you," James started quietly from across the aisle at Lily. They were in Transfiguration class and were seated in opposing desks.

"I can do it myself," Lily said through clenched teeth. She hated looking like a fool.

"But if you only let me show you you'll get it done so much faster," James persisted urgently. The cup she was supposed to be transfiguring into a flower had only gathered moss, and there was only ten minutes left in class.

"I'll do it myself, now _leave me alone._" She gave her wand a counterclockwise flourish and flicked it twice, only to cause the cup to sprout a few leaves. She groaned and tried again as Professor McGonagall stopped at her desk.

"Miss Evans, this is definitely not your best work. Why not have Mr. Potter help you with this one?" the professor said and walked away. Lily stared dumbfounded at the desk top.

"Well, I tried to help you," James shrugged and began to show her the proper wand movements, even though she was too angry to pay attention.

* * *

"Lily? Lily? Lily!" Natalie whispered and nudged her friend in the ribs.

"Ouch! What was that for?"

"You were staring at James."

"I was not! Just... just go on with the list," she muttered in defeat.

"Okay. Reason number six. His pranks. Very understandable. If I remember correctly, you said some harsh words back in fifth year when he had Snape by the lake."

"Let's not bring that up," Lily said guiltily. She didn't like being a mean person, but Potter just made her so angry.

"If you say so. Reason number five is his 'stupid Marauder pride,'" Natalie quirked a brow as she read it.

"What! He has an ego the size of an elephant just because he has a gang of morons called Marauders!"

"Remus isn't all that bad," Natalie said as she blushed. Lily saw the tinge to her cheeks but didn't comment.

"No, Remus isn't horrible, but his choice of friends makes me wonder..." Lily smiled an evil smile.

"Anyway!" Natalie said pointedly, "Reason number four is his bloody hair." Natalie chuckled. "You know, most girls love his hair. The whole windswept look is very sexy."

"Natalie!" Lily said as she smacked her friend shoulder, not bothering to hide the small smile on her face.

"Well it is! Why do you hate his hair?"

"Well, it makes my best friend say strange things," Lily laughed. "And it's just... I don't know. It's annoying how he always has to look like he just got off his broom."

"But most of the time he _did_ just get off his broom."

"Whatever! I still don't like his hair."

"Fine, be abnormal. I don't care." Lily rolled her eyes. "Reason number three: his arrogance."

"I believe no explanation is needed."

"Not really," Natalie confided with a laugh. "Reason number two is how he asks you out everyday." She gave another puzzled look. "Lils, he hasn't done that at all this year."

"Your point is?"

"He doesn't ask you out everyday anymore." Lily sighed.

* * *

"Evans? Can I talk to you?" James asked as he stood in the doorway of her compartment. Lily huffed but nodded.

"Might as well. We have to go over our Head duties."

"Well, uh, that's not really what I wanted to ask."

"I'm not going on a date with you, Potter. The answer is no."

"No! No, not that!" James held his hands up as if to stop her. "What I wanted to ask..." He gulped. "I wanted to ask why you never said yes to me." Lily stood still for a moment and he closed the door of the compartment. The train shifted and she fell into a seat, waving away his attempts to help her.

"Well, I just don't like you that way." James hung his head and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "And I guess... well, you annoy me."

"Annoy you?" James asked dejectedly. Lily nodded again. "Oh... Well, I guess I'll be leaving then." He rushed out of the train compartment before she could object.

* * *

"I guess you're right. I haven't had a decent conversation with him since that. And it's been a month."

"You feel bad don't you?" Natalie said quietly. Lily chanced a glance at the boy in question through the window.

"Maybe." Natalie smiled and picked up the list.

"And last but not least, the top reason why Lily Evans hates James Potter..." She looked at the paper and squinted to read the scribbles. "The little voice he puts in your head."

"I'll explain."

"You better."

Lily rolled her eyes and continued. "You see, every time someone brings up Potter, I hear this little annoying twittering voice in the back of my head." Natalie nodded for her to go on. "And the stupid little voice always tells me to... to give him a chance." Natalie smiled warmly.

"Why don't you listen?"

"I'm not really sure." Lily frowned and stood up. "I need to go think this over. On second thought I don't think I'm finished."

"I know how to finish it," Natalie said. She took the list and a quill and scratched something out. Lily furrowed her brow as her friend then added a new word. "Here. It's done now."

"What did you - " Lily started. Then she saw what Nat had done.

**10 Reasons Why I Love James Potter**

Lily chuckled to herself as she read the words. "You might be right," she sighed.

Natalie smiled. "I _always_ am."


End file.
